Just Wait
by TCGeek
Summary: After three unsuccessful attempts, the Caduceus crew finds that planning a surprise birthday for Sidney Kasal is no easy task. But, will he be able to outsmart them for year four, or will what they have planned finally do the trick? Oneshot Requestfic


**Okay, I'm making my way through a long list of requests. I still have to write another chapter to "Growing Up", which I posted the other day. No it is not finished, there is one more chapter.**

**This is another request from an awesome buddy of mine over on DeviantArt. It is a story about Sidney having a forced birthday party, or "party rape", as it was so affectionately called.**

**It's not terribly long, but it is substantial. Just like everything I write - if you don't know this by now I really can't help you... :D**

**Anyway, it made me laugh, and I hope it does the same for you. Enjoy!**�

* * *

It was go time.

None of them had any idea how it was going to turn out – all they knew was that they had to act fast to keep Sidney's surprise birthday party… well, a surprise.

Every year the Caduceus staff, plus Greg and Cybil from Hope, would come together, trying to pull one over on the chief on his special day. 

Though despite their efforts, every year he figured them out before they got him. They stepped up their game every passing year, but it always seemed as though Sidney was one step ahead of them, leaving them all quite frustrated but reluctant to give up.

Three year prior, Greg had gotten in contact with his mother, trying to use her to lure Sidney to Greg's house. It had seemed like it was working until Tyler Chase, who had showed up late, was caught sprinting at full speed across the street and into Greg's house just as Sidney's car turned down the street. The blonde was promptly smacked upside the head upon his entrance, and Sidney had just walked in with his arms crossed and a satisfied smile on his face.

The year after that the staff had kept it completely quiet, only sending out an email memo to everyone BUT him that they were all going to meet in the staff lounge during the midnight shift, calling Sidney in from home for some sort of medical emergency.

…However, that also happened to be the year that Sidney became involved with another member of the Caduceus staff. And in a slight misuse of power, he read through said person's work email to see if they had said anything cute about him… leading him to see the aforementioned memo. With a happy voice, he called them minutes before they were about to dial him, telling them all to put the cake away and get back to work.

The year prior to this, the staff had taken nearly every precaution they could think of, including failing to tell Leslie Sears, the hospital gossip, for fear that she may ruin it in any way, shape, or form. They had all met at a restaurant, and Greg had called Sidney, asking him to meet him for dinner, like the brothers did about once a month.

That night, Leslie walked through the doors of the restaurant, shrieking in delight when she saw all her close friends at a table, mistaking it for her _own_ surprise party. Upon her excited cue, the wait staff popped out from the back room with a giant cake and a rendition of "Happy Birthday". Tyler tried from the table to break the song up as best he could, but as soon as the staff sang the name "Sidney", the guest of honor made his entrance into the restaurant, confusing both he and Leslie – who up until that moment, still thought the celebration was for her, although two months early.

Upon hearing his name, Sidney had smiled and waved goodbye, turning on his heel and exiting the restaurant – leaving his nine friends in an absolute uproar at how close they were to finally getting him.

On the first year they had tried to celebrate his birthday, Sidney had made a bet with the entire Caduceus crew that went something like this:

"If you can honestly surprise me, I'll admit defeat and I will stay and take whatever you have planned for me. If I can figure it out before you do it, I get to show up, wave and smile like a smartass, and then leave."

And it had been a bet that Sidney was cashing in on – unfortunately for him, until that very year.

Though they thought they had outdone themselves every year, this year's surprise really took the cake. It all started one early afternoon at a pre-birthday brainstorming session at Greg and Cybil's house, a month earlier…

----------

"Alright… I don't know how this keeps happening, but Sidney always happens to be right on our tail. He's like, some sort of fun-spoiling super genius…" Angie commented, a laugh ringing through the room.

"Yeah, I was thinking the same thing…" Tyler added. "What exactly were you guys fed growing up – was it like, real chunks of Einstein or something?" he asked Greg, the elder Kasal unable to hold in his laughter.

"Ew!" Leslie squeaked, smacking Tyler in the arm. "That's so gross…"

"I say if the man doesn't want a party, you don't plan him a party… end of story."

Everyone turned to look at Victor after his negative comment with their eyebrows raised.

"We know Victor… you say that EVERY year…" Derek sighed, resting his elbow on the armrest of the couch.

"Yeah, and every year we tell you to shut up and help us or you're next…" Tyler added, high-fiving Derek as they both laughed.

Victor just huffed, blowing his bangs out of his face. "Well, there's really no point to this right now anyway, it's like, what… four months till the chief's birthday anyway? Can we go eat yet?"

Cybil laughed out loud at Victor's whining, much to his chagrin. "No, we're not going to eat until we figure this out. Besides, four months time is what we need to get ahead of Si—"

Cybil stopped in the middle of her sentence, clapping her hands once and jumping to her feet with her mouth wide open.

"That's IT!" she exclaimed, everyone looking at her with slight confusion. "That's how we're going to get him!"

"What's it? Is anyone else getting this?" Dr. Clarks asked, the rest of the room shaking their heads along with him.

"Oh come on, don't you get it!" Cybil asked, now talking wildly with her hands, as she did when she came across great excitement. 

"Um, no. We don't." Victor said, his left eyebrow raised slightly higher than his right. "This is the part where you tell us."

Derek, Angie, Tyler, and Dr. Hoffman all snickered from their places on the couch, beginning to outright laugh when Cybil promptly told Victor to "shut his smart ass".

"You guys, we're such idiots…" she started, walking around the room as she explained. "Of _course_ Sidney's going to be on the lookout for birthday plans when his BIRTHDAY is coming up…" she said, seeing the confused looks melt off of each person's face as they came to the same realization she did.

"Yeah… let's celebrate it for Christmas!" Tyler exclaimed triumphantly, everyone snapping their attention to him with bewildered looks.

The room went silent at his outburst, save for the faint sound of Victor's palm smacking into his forehead.

"Uh…" Cybil started, almost at a loss for words. "Chase?" she asked, the blonde turning towards her with a smile.

"You're an idiot." she said, wiping the smile off of the surgeon's face as he sulked back into his place on the couch, Leslie patting his leg for comfort from her place on the floor.

"What I thought we all were agreeing on just then…" Cybil continued, stopping with a small chuckle when she heard an "ow" from Derek, as Tyler had socked him in the arm for laughing. "…was that we're going to have Sidney's birthday early, so he doesn't expect it…"

"Ohhh…" Tyler said softly, scoffing and moving off of the couch when Angie began to join Derek in laughing at him.

"Not just that…" Victor said, coming out of his pessimist party to actually offer some advice. "…We keep using people that Sidney is familiar with to get him to come to these parties." he offered, watching as Cybil grew more excited, her eyes widening. 

"Victor! You're absolutely right!" she exclaimed, everyone turning and looking at the bony researcher.

"Whaaaat!" he groaned, seeing their smiling faces. "I wasn't helping – I want to eat, dammit!"

"We can't afford to have this ruined like last time…" Robert said. "Which I believe you three are all responsible for…" he said, pointing to Victor, Tyler, and Leslie.

"Not my fault he snooped in my email, the jerk!" Victor exclaimed.

"It wasn't MY fault everyone thought I couldn't handle a secret!" Leslie nearly shrieked with anger.

"Yeah, it wasn't MY fault that I showed up LATE!" Tyler yelled, realizing the error of his statement as soon as it left his mouth.

Everyone ignored Tyler, instead continuing on their brainstorm.

"Well, if we don't use any of us…" Angie started, "…then, who can we use?"

It was silent for a moment, before Greg started to chuckle.

"Oh man…" Greg said, laughing so hard he could barely breathe. "C-C-Cybil…"

Cybil walked over to where he was sitting in his favorite armchair, watching him laugh for no good reason. When he settled down, wiping the tears from his eyes, he spoke with a giant smile.

"Honey… you know how… you're, still… hahaHA!..."

Cybil just stared at him blankly, waiting for him to finish. He caught his breath and composed himself, sitting upright in his chair.

"…You know how your best friend is still on the force here in town?" he said with a mischievous smile, Cybil's smile growing as she caught his drift.

"Oh ho ho, now it gets interesting…" Robert said with a laugh.

"What do we say guys… a month from today we'll do this?" Cybil said, everyone nodding their heads in agreement.

"Alright…" she said with a giggle, pulling her cell out of her pocket. "I'll make the call right now…"

Victor looked around at everyone and then at Cybil, who did a double take upon noticing he was looking at her.

"Oh… just GO!" she said, watching as Victor scurried off to the kitchen to divulge in some much-deserved food.

----------

And that was how Robert, Cybil, Greg, Derek, Tyler, Angie, Leslie, Stephen, and Victor all got their ideas down, now ready to put them into action.

Each employee received a small envelope at their home addresses the week before, where they were instructed by the person that knew Sidney the best – his twin brother.

The weekend prior, Greg had taken Sidney hunting – something they hadn't done together in quite some time. Afterwards like a responsible human being, Sidney had taken his hunting rifles out of the trunk of his car and put them back into his house…

…and that same day when Sidney wasn't looking, Greg slid them back into the trunk with a laugh that only the evilest of plans deserved.

Off from work that day, Leslie and Tyler helped Cybil at the store and the restaurant where the party would be taking place. Feeling like this was going to be the year they were finally going to get him, they went out of their way to buy better gifts – also taking extra care to find the most obnoxious party favors possible.

Robert was put on constant "Sid-watch", as Greg liked to call it, having him call the elder Kasal and Cybil periodically to tell them what Sidney was up to.

Stephen Clarks opened his instructions in his closed office, reading them to himself.

"_Stephen – _

_At 10 pm, make up something that needs to be done, and tell Sidney that Dr. Stiles is in charge of taking care of it. Derek will only be able to take care of Sidney for a short time, so make sure that you have Victor ready with his step as soon as Sidney leaves his office."_

At 9:55, Stephen picked up his phone, dialing Sidney's extension.

"Yes?" Sidney answered from the other line.

"Hey Chief, its Stephen…" he started. "Listen – Dr. Stiles is in charge of finishing that proposal that you and I have been discussing for our seminars, correct?"

"_That's correct."_

"Well, it turns out that I by accident read the deadline date wrong – it's due in two days, not two weeks… I feel bad, but can you ask him to stay and finish it tonight so we have enough time to go over it?"

"_Yes, I'll take care of it…"_

"Thank you sir." he said, hanging up the phone. 

Victor was already in Stephen's office, reading over his instructions.

"Alright Victor, you're on… my letter says you gotta move quick though." Dr. Clarks said with a smile, watching as the black-haired researcher walked from his office.

"_Victor-_

_After Dr. Clarks finishes his, make your way to Sidney's office. Every day since I've known him, he has removed his wallet and keys from his pocket and shoved them in his top right drawer. Go in his office, find his wallet, and take his license with you. DON'T. GET. CAUGHT."_

With an annoyed groan, Victor did as he was told, stealthily running back downstairs to his lab to change, and leave. He got downstairs just in time to see Sidney descending the last flight of stairs.

"He's coming…" he whispered into Derek and Angie's office, quickly running away before he was seen.

"Ready for your acting debut, Ang?" Derek said quietly, Angie returning his smile.

"Ah – just who I was looking for…!"

Sidney stopped in the middle of his greeting to see Angie's eyes flashing dangerous amounts of anger at him.

"No. I've been here for eighteen hours. You are not looking for me because I am going_home_." she snarled.

Stepping back with slight fear Sidney raised his hands in defense as Derek tried not to laugh.

"I, wasn't coming for you Angie. I was coming to let Derek know we need him to stay for a little while longer…"

"What?" Derek whined, dropping his shoulders. "Whyyy!"

Sidney smirked, crossing his arms. "Stephen read the deadline date on that proposal wrong – it's due on Sunday night of THIS week… and it needs to get done tonight, unfortunately."

"So, I don't have to stay?" Angie asked, anger still in her expression as Derek just groaned again.

"N-No, Nurse Thompson… you may leave." Sidney replied.

"Oh, okay!" Angie quirked, suddenly happy and bubbly again. Sidney just stood in place, fearing that the slightest movement may set her off again.

"Do I have to?" Derek whined, dropping into his desk chair.

"Yes Dr. Stiles you do… and unfortunately, it is time for me to go home as well so I don't have the time to debate this with you."

Derek and Angie exchanged a glance at their fake ride situation, unbeknownst to Sidney who just eyed them suspiciously. Trading off drivers every week, the doctor and nurse rode together to work nearly since they had started working together at Hope. This week was Derek's turn, and now Angie was about to be fake stranded.

"It's okay – I'll just take the bus home." Angie said confidently, watching Derek reach into his pocket for his keys.

"Oh no you won't – it's almost midnight Angie! Do you know how many skeezes wander around here at night?" he argued, holding his keys out for her to take.

"Skeezes…?" Sidney asked quietly as they continued to talk.

"Yes I know that there are skeezebags galore, but I'm fine Derek! It's not _that_ bad…"

"Oh come on…" Derek said, crossing his arms. "Didn't you get your arm licked last time you rode the bus…?" he inquired, watching Sidney's face contort into disgust out of the corner of his eye.

"Stiles, you've got a half hour to get Nurse Thompson home and get back here for the rest of your shift. I will not have one of our best employees be subject to the… skeezes… on the bus." Sidney said, trying his best to adjust his speech to the new vocabulary.

"But, its fine—" Angie started.

"Nurse Thompson, either you let Dr. Stiles take you home or you can stay here and help him work some more."

Angie grabbed Derek's hand and dragged him forcefully out of the building in a matter of minutes, leaving the chief to mosey up to his office, grab his own belongings, and leave.

"I can't believe that worked…" Derek said with a laugh. "Greg really does know him that well…"

"I know…" Angie replied, buckling her seatbelt with a laugh. "And we're not such bad actors either… It's a good thing that I knew from all these years of dating that whining wouldn't be a problem for you…" she said with a giggle, the smile fading as the car lurched to a stop.

She looked over at Derek who had a thumb crooked out the window, pointing at the bus stop.

"You wanna get licked again?" he threatened, making Angie shudder.

----------

With a tired sigh, Sidney slipped into the driver's seat of his car, relaxing for a moment before turning the key in the ignition. He pulled the car into drive and stopped at the stop sign at the end of Caduceus's parking lot, taking a moment to loosen his tie and put on his seatbelt.

----------

"Hey, how'd it go…?" Greg asked, watching Victor and Stephen walk into the restaurant.

"Here. I didn't have anything to do with this." Victor said, thrusting Sidney's license into Greg's chest. "Where's the food?"

"Would you just sit down?" Cybil snapped, pulling Victor into a vacant chair by the back of his shirt.

"Why did Victor take his license?" Tyler asked, watching Greg reach into his pocket.

"Cause it goes great with this…" he said, holding up Sidney's registration.

Everyone busted out into laughter just as Derek and Angie walked in the door.

"Hey…" Derek said with a smile, walking into the restaurant holding onto Angie's hand, the smiling blonde at his side.

"Did he buy it?" Cybil asked the pair, still holding onto Victor's shirt to get him to stop squirming.

"Oh yeah." Derek said with a laugh, pulling out Angie's chair for her. "Not only that – I think we taught him some new vocabulary… ask him what a 'skeeze' is…"

Greg laughed. "Okay – that means he should've left right around you guys… did you call your friend?" he asked, turning to Cybil.

"Yep. I know you told me the way he usually goes home, but people are waiting for him at all bases, just in case."

"Good – but Sidney is a man of ritual. He's not going to go home a different way… He will do the same damn thing every day until he dies." Greg joked, taking a sip of his beer.

"Whatever…" Leslie said with a giggle. "All I know is, we've worked for this one – I can't wait to see what happens..."

----------

Sidney turned his wheel, driving his car onto the next street when the light he was waiting at turned green. No sooner did he turn onto the road than he saw flashing lights in his back window, alerting him to the fact that he was being pulled over for the first time in 23 years of driving.

"No way! Not my streak!" he exclaimed, pulling into a near-vacant parking lot.

As the officer approached his car, Sidney rolled down the window, completely oblivious as to what he should be doing.

"Um, I know this is going to sound weird…" he said, looking the obviously unamused officer in the eyes. "…but I've never been pulled over before – what do I need to give you?" 

The officer raised an eyebrow at Sidney. "License, registration, and proof of insurance." he said in a straight tone.

"Y-Yes, sir…" Sidney said, shaking as he reached for his wallet. His right hand reached over and pulled open his glove compartment, noting that it was completely empty. He panicked for a quick second before he looked down to his wallet, noting that the space that held his license was also empty.

"Oh no… Oh no…" he whispered over and over, frantically searching his car for the needed documents.

"Is there a problem… sir?" the officer asked, looking over in the window of the restaurant they had pulled up in front of. In it he could see Cybil waving and giving him a thumbs up in between the blinds, someone he didn't recognize standing next to her with a camera, filming the entire thing.

"No… there's no… problem, I just uh… don't seem to have my…"

"Alright – I'm going to need you to step out of the car sir."

Sidney closed his eyes and let out a shaky breath, unbuckling his seatbelt. Slowly he opened the door and rose to his feet, his nervous legs ready to give out on him at any moment. He closed the door and gripped onto his keys, ready for his next instruction.

"Is there anything in the car I need to know about?"

"N-No, I mean… uh, I don't, uh… think so…" Sidney stammered, watching the officer grow suspicious of him.

"Open the trunk for me sir…" the officer said, pacing back towards the rear of the car.

----------

"I hope this was worth it, you guys…" Greg said, watching out the window as Dr. Clarks got the entire scene on tape. 

"Why's that?" Leslie asked.

"Because he's going to kick every single one of our asses when he walks in that door…"

----------

Sidney shakily jammed the key into the lock to his trunk, turning and pulling the door up…

… to reveal his hunting rifles to him, and the nearby officer.

"Officer, I swear I took these out – they're for hunting!" Sidney stammered, his eyes nearly bugged out of his head.

"Hands in the air!" the officer yelled, pulling his nightstick out and holding it in ready beating position. Sidney's shaking arms shot over his head and the officer stepped behind him, lowering them down one by one until they were behind his back. He closed his eyes when he felt cold metal clamping down on his wrists, wondering how in the hell he was possibly going to get out of this one…

"Now sit…" the officer ordered, walking back to his patrol car where he dialed Cybil's cell.

"Are you ready for him?" he asked in a hushed tone, an evil smile creeping onto his face.

The answer on the other line was an affirmative, so the officer hung up the phone and walked over to Sidney, helping him to his feet.

"Listen. Honestly, I've gotta use the bathroom…" the officer said. "So we're going to go inside and I'm going to let you use your telephone call on the restaurant's phone, and whoever is coming to bail you out of this one can meet us at the station, alright?"

"Yes, Officer…" Sidney stammered, still shaking from the preceding chain of events.

As they walked towards the front door, Greg began to jump up and down slightly out of excitement, camera in his hands to capture the priceless moment for which Sidney's closest friends and family members had been waiting for.

"Alright, the phone's right in there. And I've got people waiting outside, so don't you dare move a muscle…" he said, walking off towards the bathroom.

Head hung, Sidney walked into the next room to use the phone, wondering how he was going to pick it up with handcuffs on, when…

"SURRRPPPPRRRIIIIISEEEE!"

The sound of the nearly blew Sidney away, and he stood there handcuffed, completely flabbergasted as Greg took the picture of the reaction for which they had all been searching. Derek, Angie, Tyler, Greg, Cybil, Leslie, Victor, Stephen, and Robert all clapped and laughed with joy, having wanted to yell that word for nearly the past four years, which directly showed in how loud it had come out.

Sidney's look dropped to sheer relief as the officer came behind him with a laugh and unlocked his handcuffs, leaving him to turn around and shake his hand in sheer gratitude. He turned back to everyone that was waiting for him with the evilest of glares, noting that not only had Greg taken a picture of him, but Dr. Clarks was still videotaping the experience.

"You, you, you, you, you, and you…" Sidney said with a slight growl, pointing out Derek, Angie, Leslie, Tyler, Victor, and Stephen individually. "…You're all… FIRED." he yelled, hand on his chest to try to ease his beating heart.

Tyler just whooped and laughed harder, everyone still high-fiving and congratulating each other on not only finally being able to celebrate Sidney's birthday with him, but turning the stone-faced director of Caduceus into the world's biggest scaredy cat.

"Oh, come here brother…" Greg taunted, pacing towards him with arms outstretched.

"Touch me and you're dead." Sidney promptly replied, ducking out of Greg's grasps and dodging to the left. Soon it had turned into an all out chase, the elder Kasal finally getting his brother in a birthday hug and subsequent noogie.

"Okay, alright…" Cybil said, calming everyone down. "I know everyone's excited, but we're forgetting something…" she said, pacing towards Sidney and giving him a hug.

Everyone paused until Cybil pulled a cone-shaped party hat out from behind her back and affixed it to Sidney's head, his eyes practically rolling back into his head out of sheer disgust. The rest of the guests launched into an uproar at the side, all donning their own party hats in jubilation. Sidney just stood there for a moment with his look of defeat and disgust, party hat with streamers coming from the top resting on his head.

"I don't want to even know how you pulled this off, or why it's three months early…" Sidney explained, taking a seat at the head of the table. "But nice work…"

Another set of high-fives went around the table, and Sidney couldn't help but chuckle at the sight.

"Would you say that… we finally beat you?" Greg said, taking great pleasure in rubbing the victory in.

"…Yes. You beat me." Sidney said, gritting his teeth.

"...Aaandd… Got it." Dr. Clarks said, turning off the video camera after the statement of defeat.

----------

Hours later and many drinks to forget the night, Sidney had to admit (only to himself) that he was actually having not that bad of a time. His closest friends sang him Happy Birthday, 38 candles stuffed onto an absolutely decadent looking chocolate cake.

"Hmm, I wonder who was responsible for making sure that all 38 candles fit on this cake… Greg?" Sidney asked, leaning forward to blow out his candles.

"Wait! Chief!" Angie exclaimed, startling Sidney so badly he nearly fell into his cake. "You have to make a wish!"

Sidney looked around at all of them, a small smile trickling onto his face.

"I wish…" he started, grin growing, "…that I have as much fun as you guys did when I'm planning all of your horrific birthday revenges." he said, blowing out his candles in one puff.

"…S'not gonna come true… you said it out loud, duh…" Tyler whispered to himself, looking down at the table.

Sidney caught Victor's attention. "Victor… would you?" he asked quietly, making a motion with his hand.

"Oh, no problem." Victor replied, reaching to his right and smacking Tyler in the back of the head.

"OowwWWW!"

A collective laugh was shared as they all sat down and passed around cake, Sidney pushing his away as it was set in front of him.

"What's the matter?" Greg asked.

Sidney leaned forward, whispering in Greg's ear.

"I'm uh… on a diet." he whispered, returning back to his seat.

Greg looked at him seriously for a moment, before a grin appeared on his lips.

"Shut the hell up and eat your cake, alright birthday boy?"

Sidney was near seething as Greg thrust a fork into his hand with a laugh.

"You just wait…" he said under his breath. "Juuust wait…"

* * *

�**Greg's gonna know when the SWAT team shows up at his house that Sidney planned a birthday party for him in revenge :D**

**Anyway, this was fun to write. I hope that you all liked it! See you soon!  
**


End file.
